Doing about the same

Not too much to report since the last time I updated the site. Carson and Cooper are doing about the same as they were. Cason is off of his blood pressure meds for now, but today his numbers were high for some reason. He is still wiggling around in his little snugglie. I changed his diaper today and he stretched his arms and legs out. They are so long! I wonder who he got that from. He is also opening both of his eyes more to look at us. It's really cute.

Cooper is much less swollen now. He looks like he is half of the size he was in the last pictures we took of him. Poor guy had to have another line put in his head for meds and stuff because his arm was still too puffy to find a vein. He is now breathing on a setting of his vent that allows him to breathe over it more. We're working his lungs and making them strong.

It's still really hard for me to go in and see them both on the vents and hooked up to all those wires. I broke down a little bit today while I was in there. I just keep wondering why this has happened to us? A friend told me yesterday that God wouldn't give me any more than I can handle but I'm not so sure I can handle all of this. I go in every day holding my breath. Andrew is doing a good job of looking at the positive side of things which helps me, but I am still just waiting for bad news about either of the boys. I know that I need to stop doing that but it's hard when all you have heard is bad. I'm so worried about their futures that I can't focus on what is going on right now. I'm so angry that my boys have to go through all of this. I can only hope and pray that they will go strong and healthy and never remember any of this part of their lives.